You Can Call Me…

Through this “stay at home” pandemic I have learned plenty of things. I have learned as a teacher and a mom. Being a mom is what I want to write about though. First and foremost, I have learned to step back and BE OK.

BE OK with a not perfectly picked up house. This was super hard for me my first week. I assumed that since I was home, I should have a picked up house. Being I work, I didn’t know any different in my thinking. Some have probably figured this out long ago, but in my mindset I should have a picked up clean house right now. What I failed to realize is that I have children at home too. 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

And my children were told they were not allowed to sit and watch tv all day or play video games all day. Which would have been an easy way to keep a picked up house. Instead, I require they play with toys, color and create stories and pictures, play games and play outside.

Toys out means they are playing and using their imagination! I love to see their creativity with the art and other items. I want them to be outside throughout the day, so yes please keep your shoes by the door!! If I’m going to ask them to do these things then I can’t expect the house to be perfect or me cleaning up all day.

Now, I’m not saying I let my house be a complete mess day after day, but I have to tell myself to stop stressing it! We live in our house and we play in our house and that’s how it should be! Especially with not being able to leave our homes because of the pandemic.

Clutter and messes really mess with my head, so I had to step back and not stress it. I literally had to talk myself through it and realize that if my kids are home, my house is not going to be spotless and that’s OK! Especially right now with a pandemic and being stuck home all day every day. Moms out there that can keep a spotless house good for them! But I needed to stop beating myself over it and getting upset at my kids for living, playing and enjoying being home. ❤️

BE OK with not loving making dinner every night. I’ve never been a big fan of making dinner, so I started doing a dinner swap, but now I am stuck making my own dinner all week. BLAH! My mind had been telling me that since I was home all day there was no reason I shouldn’t have a full and great meal every day. Well, that was stressful.

To help me be OK with this daunting task I decided to step back and be ok with easy and simple dinners and having left overs. Also that it was OK to eat out ocassionally, but I just can’t afford to eat out all week (not do I want 😬.)

So guess what, I pick one maybe two days to try for a full meal, but other than that I am keeping it simple! Last night, I just made tacos… no side dishes, just tacos! My family was fine. 😉 Another idea is to do a simple dinner and plan a dessert – not too often do we get to have dessert!! Another change I made was asking my family what they wanted to eat and they each got to pick a meal for the month! Best change I made into my meal planning!! 🙌🏼

PS be ok with not wanting to do dishes every day. Some days paper plates are just fine. 😉 Think of your sanity sometimes. 🤪

BE OK with not being like everyone you see in social media! Right now it seems like so many people are posting how they are entertaining their kids all day long and that they are doing crafts and making things. Seems like so many parents are posting all the creative stuff they are doing with their kids! I was starting to get down on myself because I’m not a crafty person, so doing crafts with my kids is not something I enjoy. Even though I am home, I am not coming up with lots of creative stuff to do. I had to step back yet again and realize I don’t need to be like other moms. I just need to be me and my best. Just because I don’t make crafts doesn’t mean I am not as good or using my “home” time! I instead do what is fun for me and the kids. We go on walks, play on the trampoline, or throw a baseball. I read with them or play games. I did make cookies one week, but I can’t do it every other day! 😜 I sure as heck can’t do all these things in one day! I try for a couple a week. And if I don’t do any of those extra activities, that’s OK!! So be ok being you as a parent not like everyone else. 🥰

BE OK with NOT entertaining your children always. Yes, it’s good to do things with your kids, take them places, and have fun with them! However, kids need to learn how to play by themselves and come up with our own ideas!! It seems like in the world right now, too many parents think they need to entertain their kids when really we don’t. Kids need to learn to think or create on their own. This will not be easy for the kids right away. They will complain that they can’t think of anything to do and therefore should just watch tv or play video games. My 3 children old enough to talk, have told me this. My response is simple: We have spent plenty of money on things to do in this house. 😏

I have a friend who has “quiet time” in her house. I don’t have a quiet time, but I loved the idea where the kids can’t bug the parents. Mine tend to follow me around and just make noise. I am pretty sure they just like to make noise around me. 😬😜 Instead of quiet time, I tell my children they can either help me clean upstairs or go downstairs and play. I give them two options that I am good with. They don’t have to like the options, but I have to like the options. I am fine with them helping me clean and pick up, but I am also fine if they go downstairs and play. Out of those two options, they can pick one or go to their bed if they don’t want one of my choices. But sometimes, this momma needs a break from 4 children – or at least 3 since 1 is a baby. This gives me a break, but it also requires them to be responsibility for their own fun.

I have watched my children make big messes during this time (pillows and blankets everywhere), but I have witnessed them coming together and enjoying each other. I have also seen them work through some issues rather than coming and tattling to mom. It has been wonderful (and interesting) watching them figure out their own asking for forgiveness and solving issues.

It’s OK to step back! Do what you can and what you want to, but don’t overwhelm yourself! ENJOY this time rather than beat yourself up. If any of my close friends (or even so many others I see) came and told me they were “sucking” at being a mom and failing their children, I could without a doubt tell them they are not. Then I would proceed to list WHY! We don’t need to do what everyone else is doing or compare ourselves. Be YOU as a mom. ❤️Be the BEST MOM in YOUR WAY. Step back and BE OK! 😍

This article is just one of the MY MIND articles to be shared on this blog. You can subscribe to see more articles when published or follow on You Can Call Me Jess Blog Page via Facebook or Follow me on Instagram.

Here are other articles in the MY MIND articles if you want to read more: